Cheers Sexy People!
Do I have a treat for you! I’m so so excited to share my latest podcast interview (Part One and Part Two) with polyamorous/queer and most importantly hilarious and awesome stand-up comedian, Mindy Raf. I had the honor of meeting Mindy when we were both presenters / performers at Consider This: A Day of Challenging the Status Quo in Sex and Relationships during the fall of 2017 in Brooklyn, New York, put on by fellow relationship coach, Effy Blue. This all day event that my two partners and I attended was mind-blowingly fantastic! I also got to share the stage with awesome humans and fellow poly-friendly colleagues Dr. Elisabeth Sheff and Tikva Wolf. All of the content shared and various presentations were chockfull of excellent information for the poly curious and those already practicing some form of non-monogamy. After such an intense day, what a delight it was to watch Mindy Raf share her talent for storytelling and humorous take on her life, her vagina, and her polyamorous exploits. My husband and I were brave and sat in the front row. Every time I looked over at the hubs while Mindy was performing, he was in absolute stitches, doubled over in laughter. Wow it was so rewarding to see him enjoying himself so much. That boy can get uber stressed over work and life, and sometimes we all just gotta laugh a little. Mindy’s performance was breathtakingly awesome, including whenever she would dance a little jig, or make a character out of her anxiety. Oh how I loved her vulnerable sharing, and silly yet insightful spins she would put on moments in her life. Yay! Later on, I found out that Mindy had performed at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival where the hubs and I had just recently enjoyed seeing some amazing performances. If I had known Mindy was there rocking her show, I so would have gone to see it! Mindy! Oh my goodness, please keep doing what you are doing as you are sharing life-changing work by giving others permission to own their stuff as well as their silly inner child. Thank you! Can’t wait to see your shows again sometime soon!
Some topics we discuss in this educational, insightful, and fun interview:
— How we were both Edinburgh Festival, where she gave her “super queer, super poly” show 26 times.
— One of my favorite shows that I saw in Edinburgh Fringe Festival that reminded me of Mindy’s brave performance as well by Butt Kapinski (http://www.buttkapinski.com)
— How she kept her energy up to complete doing a 26 show run. Wow!
— The use of words such as “fannie” versus “vagina” in the UK, the word “therapy”, how she had to change her jokes and delivery based on where in the world her audience was.
— How she identifies or gets pegged (pun NOT intended) as a “neurotic queer Jew”.
— Why she loves standup versus improv with other actors, and how it’s the “calmest” she ever feels.
— In regards to a kink metaphor, how on stage Mindy feels kind of like a “switch” (being a Domme and a submissive to the audience).
— How it used to be called “Keeping My Kidneys” and now it’s called “Not The One”.
— How the audience used to “feel sorry for her” and how she needed to work with a good director to help her shape the show to discuss the oddities and humor of her relationship structure.
— How she wrote approximately six versions of the one-hour show which will eventually be a book as well.
— Her love of performing a “Feminist Queer Poly Show” right after the presidential election, which she found to be very healing and fun.
— The similarities between writing my “Jealousy Survival Guide” book and this blog alongside her comedy show work.
— We discussed one of my favorite storyteller experts that I know from the World Domination Summit, YesYesMarsha (Marsha Shandur). Marsha, if you read this —> I love you! You are amazing!
— Why she describes herself as “poly-adjacent” when she started her consensually non-monogamous journey, and why she thinks it makes her a better person and even helps her with her anxiety.
Thank you Mindy, for being so awesomely generous with your time, for your absolutely hilarious and brilliant comedic and queer-friendly creative work, and for sharing your wisdom and insights with us via the podcast interview! It was enlightening, hysterical at times, and so fun! Follow Mindy’s comedic journey, adventures, and work at mindyraf.com, on Twitter @mindyraf, and on Instagram @mmmindela.
To hear the podcast, go to the Podcast link here and subscribe to the Loving Without Boundaries podcast, and check out Episodes 88 and 89 with Mindy. Also, please help spread awareness of alternative lifestyles and create more tolerance for consensual non-monogamy in the world at large by Rating and Reviewing the Loving Without Boundaries podcast in iTunes. It only takes a few minutes.
If you would like to be interviewed either in written form or via audio on the podcast, please feel free to contact me and we will set something up. Thank you!
EXCLUSIVE CONTENT OFFER – We continue to have some exciting goings on here at Loving Without Boundaries (LWB). We now have exclusive content for you via the LWB podcast and my Patreon page for those who choose to become a patron. Please visit the link to check out how you can come join the party over at Patreon! Want to hear more from our amazing interviewees? You got it! Want to dig deeper into the community and your fellow poly folk? Right on, let’s do it! Want free coaching sessions? It’s all there! Come join us, and enjoy exclusive content made just for you, our patrons of this work!
1) Free LWB Facebook Group for Open Healthy Relationships — Ready to explore healthy, deeply connected (and virtually jealousy-free) open relationships? It’s all possible – especially when surrounded by a community of people already doing it. Many in newly open relationships experience roller coaster emotions of jealousy, insecurity, and feel alone on their journey. That’s why I created this free Facebook group where people are coming together to share actionable tips for succeeding in multiple loving relationships, explore deeper love, and find mutual understanding and support. There’s an abundance of rock star information posted in the group daily by our amazing members. We create a safe place to engage that’s fun and thrilling! Click here and request to join our free group!
2) Endless Poly Summer (Mt. Storm, West Virginia), August 17–22, 2018 – Endless Poly Summer has an eclectic yet integrated approach to creating an environment that allows each person to thrive. They bring in top-notch presenters who share a wide range of tools, techniques, and insights for dealing with all aspects of relationships, sexuality, and self-integration. The result is that the participants have a huge pool of technologies and practices to draw from. Each person is fully “at choice” in any of the events, and each person is free to use the insights and practices that work best for them. Not just another superficial meet-and-greet, Endless Poly Summer is 6 days long so that there is time for real connections to be made, and real interactions to flow from these connections. Campers help each other to work through issues that may arise, using new tools and techniques where appropriate, with the guidance of our experienced support team. NOTE: I will be giving two workshops at this year’s Endless Poly Summer on Saturday and Sunday! Tikva Wolf, famed poly web-comic creator, will be presenting as well. Come join us!
3) Beyond The Love (BTL) (Columbus, Ohio), November 9–11, 2018 — Beyond The Love is a 3-day polyamory convention in Columbus, Ohio, held yearly. They are in our sixth year and focus on education, workshops, social activities, meeting other polyamory people, and fun! From their website: “Falling in love is the easy part. But what happens after that? Beyond The Love’s mission is to provide an opportunity for the polyamorous community to come together in an educational and social forum. At Beyond the Love you will find a wealth of classes, workshops and mini events to learn tools, techniques and communication skills to enhance our poly relationships. We provide a safe environment for meeting with other like-minded people in a supportive and inclusive community. We welcome all those living a poly lifestyle or considering doing so. We are passionate about recognizing poly as a relationship choice and sharing common experiences on our many different paths. We hope you’ll join us and share yours!” NOTE: I will not only be presenting two workshops at BTL, I will also be the Keynote Speaker Friday night! Come join us at this fun polyamorous conference!
See you on the flip side, lovely community! Keep being brave, compassionately vulnerable, and uniquely and authentically you!
Wishing you peace, love and happiness,
(and thrilling, fun sex too!)
Need more specific help aligning your relationships with who you are?
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