podcast-graphicTHE LOVING WITHOUT

offers interviews, lessons and insights on the subjects of polyamory and ethical non-monogamy. Our mission is to create more awareness and acceptance of these lifestyle choices through education, communication and the respectful exchange of ideas.

We seek to promote healthy relationships, tolerance and understanding – whether you are already living a life of ethical non-monogamy or are among those who are curious to know more. We love to create, share stories of courage and growth, encourage loving responsibly, and spread positive energy. So come join us!


Exclusive content & special offerings if you become a patron of this podcast.
Jim Fleckenstein Headshot


Jim Fleckenstein became a relationship coach and educator because of his own life experiences. After the end of his 25-year marriage in 2000, he put the skills he’d gained from his successful non-profit career and his insatiable curiosity to work on relationships. He began a rigorous self-education process that included reaching out personally to leading researchers. His efforts quickly bore fruit. He created an organization that focuses on self-education, scientific research, and helping people have successful relationships. Along the way, Jim developed a unique approach to relationships based on proven methods he encountered over his years of study. Ultimately, he formalized this approach as his Affirmative Intimacy(tm) method. His book, “Love That Works: 38 Awesome Hacks for Amazing Relationships” came out in December 2019.

RELATED LINKS | Company Website | Book Webpage | Facebook

Russ Haywood headshot


Russ Haywood is a social systems innovator, and has a Philosophy BA and Political Theory BA from the University of Minnesota and an MBA from Hamline University. Russ is also co-founder of Unveil Social, a Minneapolis B-corp that just launched CanWe – Your dating guidance app. CanWe’s mission is to help daters cut out the frustration of modern dating with researched guidance.

RELATED LINKS | CanWe App Website

Amy Bond Photo


Amy Bond is the Founder of Pole & Dance Studios, a network of pole dance studios across the Pacific NW. She is the co-star of the recently released Netflix documentary, “Strip Down, Rise Up” and author of a memoir called “Becoming California”, about leaving the Mormon church and the porn industry.

Jhen Monogamish Headshot


Born and raised in Jamaica, Jhen is a pansexual, polyamorous romance novel enthusiast who is passionate about music. She is the creator and host of Monogamish Pod, and co-host of The Blachelorettes and Stacked podcasts. She is also a bookstagrammer and a sensitivity reader for Queer, Caribbean and Polyamorous content.

Wendy Rose Berry and Eugenia Marshall Headshot


Wendy Rose Berry and Eugenia Marshall are LA based employed entrepreneurs, mothers, and besties both juggling and balancing demanding corporate jobs and running their own intimate skincare brand as co-founders of conditionHER. This natural moisturizing cream is scientifically formulated for your external intimate area. It effectively maintains pH balance, slays ingrowns, fights chafing issues, nourishes skin, and softens hair down there! conditionHER is female owned and operated, including the biochemist and packaging designer.

Rosie Wilby Headshot


Rosie Wilby is an award-winning comedian, author, podcaster and activist from the U.K. Through her books “Is Monogamy Dead?” and “The Breakup Monologues”, she’s trying to spread awareness of more conscious ways of connecting and disconnecting whether we are mono, poly or somewhere in between.

Martha Kauppi Headshot


Martha Kauppi is a therapist, author, speaker, and educator specializing in complex relational therapy, sex issues, and alternative family structures. She trains therapists all over the world, and is the author of the groundbreaking new book “Polyamory: A Clinical Toolkit for Therapists (and Their Clients)”.

RELATED LINKS | FacebookInstagram | LinkedIn | Book | YouTube | Website

Megan Stubbs Headshot


Megan Stubbs, Ed.D., is a sexologist, relationships expert, and body image specialist. With her degrees in biology and human sexuality, she is able to combine two of her favorite things, science and sex, into a cohesive platform to impact her audience. She is mindful of inclusion and brings a sensitivity to ethnic diversity rooted in her own complex heritage. She believes that sex should be fun and uses her lighthearted, intelligent, and humorous delivery to make it happen.

Leigh Montavon Headshot


Leigh Montavon (they/she) is a holistic sex and relationship coach who specializes in working with queer, non-monogamous, and kinky clients. They are also a writer for Hustler Magazine online, and co-host of the podcast “Queers Next Door”. Leigh is passionate about body liberation, dismantling the white cis-hetero patriarchy, and combating shame.

RELATED LINKS | Instagram | Website


Jeff Abraham is the CEO of Absorption Pharmaceuticals, whose lead product, Promescent, is addressing a global need for men suffering from Premature Ejaculation and Erectile Dysfunction. He and his team are dedicated to bringing innovative products to market that solve sexual performance issues for both men and women. With over 10-years experience in the field of sexual wellness, Jeff has seen and heard from thousands of couples and is a great thought leader in the space.

RELATED LINKS | Twitter | Promescent Website

Heath Schechinger and Amy Moors Headshot


Dr. Heath Schechinger is a licensed psychologist based in California, where he maintains a private practice in addition to his position as a Counseling Psychologist at UC Berkeley. Heath is also the Founding Co-Chair of the American Psychological Association’s Division 44 Committee on Consensual Non-monogamy, Co-Founder of the Polyamory Legal Advocacy Coalition, and Advisor to the Kinsey Institute’s Haslam Collection on Polyamory.

Dr. Amy C. Moors is a psychologist who researches and teaches about LGBTQ+ issues, consensual non-monogamy, gender, and inclusion in higher education. Amy is an Assistant Professor of Psychology and Faculty Affiliate in Engineering at Chapman University. She is also a Research Fellow at The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University and Co-Chairs the American Psychological Association’s Division 44 Committee on Consensual Non-monogamy. Amy’s goal is to use science to address social issues, such as discrimination, with the hope of moving up and onward (the name of her lab).

Dillon Birdsell Headshot


Dillon Birdsall is an award-winning documentary filmmaker and founder of All The Birds Productions. His first feature film “V-Card” won the best documentary feature at Cinekink, the premier film festival for sexuality and adult content. Dillon is a graduate of Florida School of the Arts, and is well versed in documentary film, narrative, online content, and podcasting. You can see his content on YouTube at Unlimited Free Time, or listen to his podcast with co-host Warren Chao, called Pop Culture Part People.

Claire Louise Travers headshot


Claire Louise Travers is founder and regular host of the Poly Pages podcast, with higher degrees from four European Universities, including in Philosophy and History of Ideas, and a double Masters in International Humanitarian Management. Claire uses the labels queer, pansexual and solo-poly and cannot remember a time when she felt monogamy was for her. Claire often joins the podcast remotely, as she works globally in the humanitarian aid sector.

Initially begun as a podcast in 2018, by 2020, the Poly Pages platform was launched  to advocate for the inclusion of non-monogamous and alternative relationship strategies in social research and public policy. In 2021, Poly Pages launched events – cutting edge conversations tailored for the academic and non-monogamous communities. Today, the Poly Pages platform critically enables academia, polyamory and social justice to come together through the podcast, resource hub, and events.

RELATED LINKS | Instagram | Poly Pages website

Axel Blumenberg headshot


Axel D. Blumenberg, Ph.D. doesn’t live exclusively with his wife, in more than one joyful, happy, non-traditional relationship. He is a passionate advocate of ethical non-monogamy and personal freedom. He loves traveling, Japanese rope bondage, and embracing the delicious cuisine in Spain, the country that he has made his home. Coming from a professional background as a lawyer, he knows how to find unusual paths to happiness.

RELATED LINKS | Facebook | Marriage and Beyond

Laurel Schrock Headshot


Laurel Schrock, a network engineer for Verizon Communications, hails from Mount Vernon, NY. She’s an Army Vet, a graduate of Georgetown University and also a small business owner, making her love for candles into what she calls a “hobby that now pays for itself.”  Laurel has always identified as monogamous but a little over two years ago, she began dating an awesome guy who happened to be poly.  Earlier this year (2021), she began to experience intense and debilitating insecurities. Although it was gradual, she was struggling and she knew she needed help.

RELATED LINKS | LWB Workshops | FREE Masterclass

Kathy Slaughter headshot


Understanding how abuse happens, how to recover from it, and how communities can prevent abuse and respond to harm in life-affirming ways forms the basis of Kathy’s passion. Grounded in Social Work values and paradigms, Kathy has spent 15 years working on healing trauma and uncovering pleasure, agency, and safety in the consulting room. Currently, she leads a team of six at Soaring Heart Counseling, a sex-positive, queer-affirming, trauma-informed therapy practice in Indianapolis, Indiana.

In pursuit of liberation, Kathy enjoys practicing yoga and meditation, dancing, hiking, and planning outdoor adventures with friends at regional Burning Man festivals.

RELATED LINKS |  TwitterInstagram | Website | YouTube

Marie Thouin photo


Dr. Marie Thouin is a Mindful Dating & Relationship Coach who supports people of all backgrounds and relationship orientations to create intentional love lives. Her PhD research investigated the experience of compersion in consensually non-monogamous relationships.

Elizabeth Sheff Head Shot


Dr. Elisabeth “Eli” Sheff is a researcher, expert witness, coach, speaker, and educational consultant. With a PhD in Sociology (University of Colorado, Boulder, 2005) and certification as a Sexuality Educator from the AASECT (American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists, 2012), Dr. Sheff specializes in gender and sexual minority families, consensual non-monogamy, and kink/BDSM. Sheff is the foremost academic expert on polyamorous families with children, and her 20+ year Polyamorous Family Study is the only longitudinal study of poly families with children to date.

RELATED LINKS |  Twitter | Facebook | Website | The Bonding Project

Sagan Morrow photo


Sagan Morrow is a romantic comedy novelist (with a focus on polyamorous relationships), productivity strategist for multi-passionate creatives, and host of the Indie Author Weekly podcast.

RELATED LINKS | TwitterInstagram | SaganMorrow.com

Clive Silvaticus Head Shot


Clive Silvaticus is an IT professional, communicator, musician, anarchist, and former soldier from Herefordshire, UK. Clive’s introduction to Loving Without Boundaries came from his life partner, convinced as she was that he could be more aligned with his best life, and more involved in the polyamorous community. She had a point. Clive has always been polyamorous by orientation, always been uncomfortable with the ideology behind monogamy, and the structures that support it, and is working to help bring awareness and acceptance to polyamorous relating. Today, his focus is on understanding the communicative tools and skills necessary to make positive, supportive, polyamory accessible to all.

RELATED LINKS | LWB Workshops | FREE Masterclass

Phoenix Mandel headshot


Certified Sexuality Educator Phoenix Mandel has been a sexuality educator and consultant since 2006, workshopping on sex and body positivity, kink, ethical nonmonogamy, and LGBTQIA+, alongside other areas of sexual health and sexual rights. Phoenix teaches classes internationally and currently resides in Los Angeles. They have an intersectional and activist approach, with a mission to make sex education more queer.

RELATED LINKS | Twitter: @MandelPhoenix | Instagram: @phoenix.mandel | Linktree | Patreon

Michael Love headshot


Michael Love is an advocate of ethical non-monogamy who has been actively non-monogamous since 2010. He co-habitates with his wife and girlfriend in a Poly V living arrangement. Together, along with a team of creative contributors, he has produced a wonderful magazine for the non-monogamous community called ENM Magazine.

RELATED LINKS | Instagram: @enmmagazine | website: ENM Magazine

Ian Jenkins Headshot


Dr. Ian Jenkins is the author of “Three Dads and a Baby: Adventures in Modern Parenting”, a debut memoir about his experiences trying to have a baby as part of a polyamorous gay “Throuple.” The three men wanted to have a child, but the road to having a baby took them through embryo adoption, IVF and surrogacy, dealing with lawyers and doctors, enormous medical bills, questions about polyamorous parenting, and legal battles to get all 3 dads listed on the birth certificate (they were the first to do so). The book will be published March 9 and is available for pre-order on Amazon.

RELATED LINKS | Instagram: @three_dads_and_a_baby | Book: Three Dads and a Baby

Joanna Angel headshot


Joanna Angel is an adult film star, director, producer, author, and owner of the BurningAngel Empire, the company known for the emergence and prevalence of tattooed women in the adult film industry. “Club 42” is her second choose-your-own erotic fantasy book. Her first, “Night Shift,” received much praise for being sex positive, gender inclusive, open minded, and diverse.

RELATED LINKS | Instagram: @joannaangel | Facebook | FanPage 

Leah Marshall Headshot


Leah Marshall is a relationship and human dynamics junkie and the founder and leader of the Esther Perel Discussion Group on Facebook, a community of over 12,000 members from across the globe who regularly discuss relationships, intimacy, sex, desire, and infidelity. She’s also the creator of Song Therapy, a video series hosted in partnership with the hiitide app, which breaks down the relationship dysfunction in popular songs.

Alison Ash Headshot


Dr. Alison Ash is a trauma-informed sex and intimacy coach and educator, lecturer at Stanford University, author, and founder of TurnON.love. As a sociologist with a PhD from Stanford, Dr. Ash has a comprehensive understanding of the complex societal challenges that often lead to unsatisfying and disempowering sexual experiences. Dr. Ash designs workshops, courses, and retreats and offers individuals and couples coaching to give others the tools to discover their desires and confidently pursue them. She invites you to TurnON pleasure, intimacy and love at www.TurnON.love

RELATED LINKS | TurnON Love | Facebook and Instagram: @turnon.love

Dan and Dawn Headshot


Dan and Dawn have been partners since 2001 and have presented at over 100 events around North America. They are the authors of the “Polyamory Toolkit” and “The Polyamory Dating Guide”, co-host of the Erotic Awakening podcast, and referenced in a number of books, articles, and other media.

RELATED LINKS | Erotic Awakening | The Polyamory Dating Guide | Facebook and Instagram: @eroticawakening | Twitter: @dananddawn

Tessa & Amir Headshot


Tessa & Amir are the original open nesters who host a unique podcast called The Open Nesters. They are a wildly creative couple who have been married for 31 years, half of which they have been polyamorous. They chose to be in an open relationship, agreeing to ethical non-monogamy both emotionally & physically, and you will hear of some alternative practices—outside and inside the bedroom through their interviews with inspiring individuals, partners & experts, including their process of ‘coming out’ to their adult kids. The podcast also opens pathways toward exploring physical, spiritual & intellectual passions and tackles the topic of ageism in our society.

Together, Tessa & Amir have explored many different pursuits and launched interesting businesses, and during non-COVID-19 times, they travel extensively.

RELATED LINKS | theopennesters.com


      • I would love the chance to interview, Kitty. You have a way of drawing out ideas that I might never otherwise consider. Tonight it occured to me as I listened to part 2 pf the Michael Rios interview that perhaps I need to learn to more deeply love myself. After all, I preach that loving yourself is the greatest relationship you can have in life. I seek to empower others and help them see and realize their own worth. Then it occured to me that I am lonely and feel stifled if I can’t GIVE love to another. Michael spoke of others as vending machines for our needs. I don’t….didn’t…see them in that way, but I saw then that I need to BE that stand-alone, self-validating individual that I strive to help others become. My own growth and change is imminent now.

        • Hi Steven! I am looking forward to hopefully scheduling a podcast interview with you. Thank you for your kind and complementary words on my interviewing skills and methods of drawing out a great conversation from my interviewees. Michael Rios is one of my favorite interviews to date. I had the pleasure of seeing him present at Beyond The Love last year. So I did have a preview already of what he could bring to the table. His presentation called “Polyamory as a Spiritual Path” just blew me away when I heard it. And yes it was very much focused on loving ourselves so well that we don’t need to use other people as emotional vending machines. What a valuable concept that I carry with me to this day. I am so heartened to hear that this concept resonated with you too from my podcast interview with Michael. Go rock your personal growth, my friend! Yeah!!!

      • Wow, this has been so much fun to go from start to finish through these interviews. I’m in the middle of the most recent one now. So much knowledge and so much love. This is such a rewarding and valuable service you are providing.

        • Wow back atcha, Steven, this comment and sentiment rocks! I never knew I was someday going to be a podcast show creator. I have found it incredibly rewarding for so many reasons, including getting to talk to and gather knowledge from so many smart, compassionate and awesome people. I am thrilled that you are enjoying the interviews so much! It helps me to keep going!

    • Thank you so much for your kind note. I’m so glad that you like the podcast! It is alot of work but so rewarding. I’m enjoying it! Thanks for having such a beautiful and open mind, my lady friend! And THANK YOU for rating and reviewing it on iTunes. You rock! xoxo

  1. I was curious if you had any hints or tips on meeting poly folk? I moved to the lovely city of Baltimore not to long ago and finding others that are in the city has been an adventure. Most of the poly meet ups are out of the city limits – and me embracing the urban lifestyle no longer have a car! SHOCK HORROR! Are there any other places that folk gather online (i am newer to seeking out other poly folks) and plus – i would like to date girls (i am bisexual) but can’t seem to find any in my area. Maybe it is just a regional thing – but any tips would be appreciated.

    • Thanks for your comment! I don’t live far from you – in the Washington DC area. My best suggestion to you is the BmorePoly group (www.bmorepoly.org) in the Baltimore / DC / Nova region run by Barry and Cathy Smiler whom I’ve interviewed for the podcast. You can find their Meetup group here: http://www.meetup.com/BmorePoly. Other local groups and venues for events are Tabu, Bound, The Crucible and Entre Nous (though those are more on the swinger side of ethical non-monogamy).

      Another online community that you can check out is polyamorynetwork.com or also fetlife.com might be great for the bisexual side of you. They have forums there that you can join on any topic under the sun, including personals.

      I hope that helps! Let me know how you fair.

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