The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory,
Open Relationships & Other Adventures
by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy
— Some regard this as the “bible” of polyamory. Written thoroughly in a very witty, honest, and at times hilarious style. The essential guide for singles and couples who want to explore polyamory in ways that are ethically and emotionally sustainable.
Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and
Sustaining Open Relationships
by Tristan Taormino
— An excellent overall read on open relationships, dating and relating, complete with great information on jealousy and setting boundaries. Opening Up explores the real-life benefits and challenges of all styles of open relationships — from partnered non-monogamy to solo polyamory.
Polyamory in the 21st Century: Love and Intimacy with Multiple Partners
by Dr. Deborah Anapol
— More of an overview as well as a scientific approach to polyamory, citing history of polyamory, ethical concepts, jealousy, “coming out”, etc. This book weaves together research and facts to provide an informed and impartial analysis of polyamory as a lifestyle and as a movement
Sex at Dawn: How We Mate, Why We Stray,
and What It Means for Modern Relationships
by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jetha
— This thought provoking book tries to debunk everything we know about “sex” using evidence from anthropology, primatology, psychosexuality, etc. It also speaks of our innate capacities for love, cooperation and generosity.
Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life
by Byron Katie and Stephen Mitchell
— This book was suggested to me by a dear friend in the poly community and it is absolutely amazing. I recommend everyone read it, poly or not. It comes from a very zen perspective about accepting reality… with love.
I Need Your Love: Is That True?
by Byron Katie and Michael Katz
— This book was suggested to me by a different friend in the poly community and it is equally amazing. It focuses on how to stop seeking love, approval and appreciation and start finding them instead, and focuses heavily on relationships.
Non-Violent Communication: A Language Of Life
by Marshall B. Rosenberg, Ph.D.
— I found this book to be incredible – I think it should be required reading for humans who deal with other humans. It touches on many topics such as empathetic listening, learning to express your feelings in a loving, productive way that diffuses conflict and anger and builds trust.
The Five Love Languages
by Gary Chapman
— Does it seem as though you and your partner(s) are speaking two different languages? The author guides couples in identifying, understanding, and speaking their partner’s primary love language—quality time, words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service, or physical touch.
The Husband Swap
by Louisa Leontiades
With raw and intimate prose, Louisa Leontiades unflinchingly shares her story, with all its drama, passion, joy and conflict as she and her husband stumble, make mistakes, and look for a path to a sustainable polyamorous future. This is not a how-to manual or a guide to polyamory. It is the true story of four ordinary people who challenged monogamy to pursue a utopia of limitless love.
Lessons in Love and Life to My Younger Self: A Companion Guide to The Husband Swap
by Louisa Leontiades
Lessons in Love and Life to My Younger Self is the companion guide to the memoir. If you could travel back in time to give yourself advice, what would you say? What does opening your relationship teach you about the nature of life, love and yourself? Could they have avoided the heartache? Did the experience bring limitless love and possibilities, or was it all just one huge mistake?
The Game Changer: a memoir of disruptive love
by Franklin Veaux
To make an open marriage work, Franklin and Celeste knew they needed to make sure no one else ever came between them. That meant there had to be rules. No overnights, no falling in love, and either one of them could ask the other to end an outside relationship if it became too much to deal with. It worked for nearly two decades—and their relentless focus on their own relationship let them turn a blind eye to the emotional wreckage they were leaving behind them.
More Than Two: a practical guide to ethical polyamory
by Franklin Veaux and Eve Rickert
Can you love more than one person? Have multiple romantic partners, without jealousy or cheating? Absolutely! Polyamorous people have been paving the way, through trial and painful error. Now the new book More Than Two can help you find your own way. With completely new material and a fresh approach, Franklin Veaux and Eve Rickert wrote More Than Two to expand on and update the themes and ideas in the wildly popular polyamory website.
Stories from the Polycule
by Dr. Elisabeth Sheff
The first of its kind, this anthology brings together stories, poems, drawings and essays created by real people living in polycules. Children describe life with more than two parents; adults share what it’s like to parent with more than one partner. We hear from triads, solos, people who have felt polyamorous their entire lives, and people exploring poly for the first time – all pieces reflect the diverse reality of polyamorous families.
From reading what you have to say here I am now identifying as poly-sexual. I love my beau very much. At this time he is A-sexual. He need to lose a great deal of weight before his turtle will come out of his shell.
Thanks for commenting. So you identify as polysexual because you are not sexual with your boyfriend, whom you love exclusively, but are open to sex with others as a sexual release (but don’t want to get romantically involved with them?)
Thank you for your reply. I think I nailed it on the head of the nail.