Podcast Interview: Jessica Fern & David Cooley, Conflict Resolution & Trauma Informed Professionals

Hello, Loving Without Boundaries (LWB) community!

I am over-the-moon thrilled – as well as honored – to share my latest podcast interview with Jessica Fern, a Certified Clinical Trauma professional, and David Cooley, the creator of the Restorative Relationship Conversations model. Jessica & David are co-authors of “Polywise: A Deeper Dive Into Navigating Open Relationships” and “Transforming the Shame Triangle: From Shame to Love using Parts Work“. I have had the pleasure of being dear friends with Jessica ever since we first met at the Beyond The Love conference way back in 2018, when I was both the keynote speaker and presenter. I resonate deeply both with her heart-centered work, as well as David Cooley’s ground-breaking work that I deeply respect as well. These two beautiful humans have a massive wealth of not only knowledge, but also heart, and empathy for their fellow humans. You can see that shine through in their collaborations where they vulnerably share their own stories (as do I on this interview as well) of heartbreak, loss, and eventual triumph navigating life’s inevitable ebbs and flows. Their latest work that overlaps the “Drama Triangle” (one of my favorite tools) with their “Shame Triangle” I have no doubt will help thousands move up and out of the corrosive effects of the emotion of shame. Jessica and David – thank you for being dear friends, colleagues, fellow love enthusiasts, and spectacular supporters of our wider community, and really ANYONE who struggles with shame, as we all do at some point. I deeply admire and respect your work, and on behalf of our whole LWB community, offer my gratitude – including for this enlightening conversation. You two are just … AWESOME! Sending big love your collective way to you and your family. 

Here is her Bio:

Jessica Fern holds a Master’s degree in Conflict Resolution, is a Certified Clinical Trauma Professional, a trained Internal Family Systems (IFS) practitioner, and an integrative therapist drawing on 25 years of experience in somatic, narrative, psychotherapeutic, and spiritual healing modalities. She is the internationally recognized author of “Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and Nonmonogamy“, “The Polysecure Workbook”, and “Polywise: A Deeper Dive Into Navigating Open Relationships”. Through her international private practice, Jessica works with individuals, couples, and multi-partner relationships to break free from reactive patterns, cultural conditioning, insecure attachment, and past trauma — empowering them to embody new possibilities in life and love.

Here is his Bio:

David Cooley is a professional Restorative Justice facilitator, diversity and privilege awareness trainer, and bilingual cultural broker. He is the creator of the Restorative Relationship Conversations model, a process that transforms interpersonal conflict into deeper connection, intimacy and repair. In his private practice, David specializes in working with non-monogamous and LGBTQ partnerships, incorporating a variety of modalities including trauma-informed care, attachment theory, somatic practices, narrative theory, and mindfulness-based techniques.

Some topics we discuss in this highly interesting, informative, and thought-provoking interview:

• How David’s collaboration with Jessica evolved from a life partnership post-divorce.
• Conscious uncoupling rituals and how they allow for transformation. 
• Navigating complex relational shifts with intention and respect.
• The need to support people facing the emotional challenges of opening relationships, particularly when attachment wounds surface.
• Relational repair needs after opening monogamous relationships.
• Transforming the Shame Triangle: the inner critic (persecutor), inner victim (deflated shame), and inner rescuer (escaper parts). 
• How shame can obscure itself, requiring conscious effort to recognize and transform.
• Tune in to listen to this fantastic podcast episode!

Thank you, Jessica and David, for being so wonderfully generous with your time, and for sharing your work and life with us via the podcast interview! It was enlightening, interesting, and so fun! You can learn more about Jessica on her Website, and Instagram. You can learn more about David on his Website, or on his Instagram.

To hear the podcast, go to the Podcast link here and subscribe to the Loving Without Boundaries podcast, then check out Episode 278 with Jessica Fern & David Cooley. Also, please help spread awareness of alternative lifestyles and create more tolerance for consensual non-monogamy in the world at large by Rating and Reviewing the LWB podcast in iTunes. It only takes a few minutes.

If you would like to be interviewed either in written form or via audio on the podcast, please feel free to contact me and we will set something up. Thank you!

ANNOUNCEMENT — GUEST PODCAST APPEARANCES