Cheers Sexy People!
My, my, my how time flies! I am finding it hard to believe that we are so far into February already! Time races forward whether we are ready for that speedy adventure or not. I want to stop for a moment on this crazy train to say a word of gratitude to you all: THANK YOU! Thank you for being here; for reading, listening and enjoying this blog and podcast here at Loving Without Boundaries; for supporting anyone in your life who lives an alternative lifestyle especially in this political climate today; and for just generally being awesome you. It takes bravery, courage, and sheer radical belief in your authentic self to walk to the beat of a different drum than the majority of society. I would like to say: I see you, I am proud of you, I stand with you to the end of the earth, and you ROCK!
I also want to say thank you for your patience in me sharing with you details about my life and adventures here on the blog lately. It is not for lack of desire to share with you all. Nor is it a lack of time per se, as we are all in charge of our own schedules, priorities, time management, and what we choose to focus on. Many times over the last few years, I complained to one of my mentors that there is never enough time in the day to get everything done. She brilliantly challenged me and said “There is TOO much time!” When I sat and pondered, it really made me realize how many minutes that turn into hours that we spend on various things that perhaps do not bring us joy, or do not further our mission, or are not empowering or productive, and on and on. When I feel time racing by, I do my best to remember to stop, take a breath, and think about what I am doing in that moment. Is it “making my boat go faster” in terms of my overall mission, goals, and aspirations? Or is it dragging me down? And of course, we all need time to relax, heal, meditate, connect with our many loved ones – which of course gets even more complicated in a polyamorous constellation.
Some of you know that I choose a word at the beginning of each year to help guide me and any difficult decisions I may encounter as I traverse through my adventures that year. In 2015 the word I chose was “grace” due to having come through a difficult and challenging part of my life, and I wanted to remember to act with grace when faced with any adversity. In 2016 my word was “change”, though as I reflect back on last year, I think a better word to describe what actually happened was “growth”. Last year I was very attentive to my own learning, growing, expanding, and meeting and connecting with as many people as possible – including my new, amazing, awesome-filled boyfriend who moved in to to join our family halfway through the year. I suppose that was quite a “change”, wasn’t it? What a fantastic change and addition to our lovely household! I am still ecstatic and over the moon at my good fortune in that regard.
Well this year, I have selected the word:
FOCUS
… and it has been serving me well so far. I have many irons in the fire right now, and projects and missions of awesome that I would like to create and get out into the world to serve you, my community. And while I would like to do everything and anything all of the time, that is simply not possible. Multi-tasking in this girl’s humble opinion is a myth. The way to get things done not only adequately but excellently is to truly FOCUS all of your energy in one direction at a time, each moment. That is the key to success, especially for someone like myself who can feel very scattered, and can get excited about every bright shiny butterfly that happens to cross my path.
Thanks to … um… focusing on the word “focus”, I have been able to materialize the following:
- A miracle happened! A workshop on polyamory that I was scheduled for months to give at the University of North Florida during their Sex Week got canceled because it was too controversial. The students at the school, particularly the LGBT community rose up together and expressed their sincere and passionate opinions about free speech, open education and ideas, and were able to get the workshop put back on! So now I am extremely focused on creating, materializing, and making this workshop come to life so that I can really give these students the amazing presentation and learning opportunities that they are looking for. I find that creating workshops takes ALOT of determined focus. I am loving every minute of it. If you would like to read about part of the adventure so far, click here.
- I am well into my relationship coaching certification program. And I am thrilled and so very grateful to say that this week, I received my first coaching certification called the ELI-MP – which stands for Energy Leadership Index, Master Practitioner. This means I am now a specialist in rendering the E.L.I. Assessment as well as debriefing someone on their results and what that means to them in their life and relationships. As part of the Energy Leadership Index assessment and debrief process, you would learn about the 7 levels of leadership and how much energy you currently have in the draining-suppressing range and in the expanding-inspirational range. Click here if you have any interest in learning more. I am excited to be able to add this skillset and service here at Loving Without Boundaries. Stay tuned.
- At the end of march, I will also be giving two of my workshops at the first ever polyamory conference in Boise, Idaho called RelateConn. I will be sharing the same two workshops that I presented at Beyond The Love this past November: The Effect of Breakups on our Polycule, and The Effects of the “Poly Closet” on Metamours, Ex-metamours and Pivot Partners. Learn more about this upcoming conference by clicking here. There looks to be an absolutely fantastic lineup of presenters ready to share their knowledge with you, our community.
- I participated in the Women’s March last month in my hometown of Washington, DC with hordes and hordes of amazing, strong, and powerful women as well as men, including my dear husband. It was an experience like no other I had ever experienced in my life, and I was honored to be a part of history. I was also honored to wear an inspiring and kickass t-shirt that I acquired at Beyond The Love created by Kimchi Cuddles to share my polyamory pride in all of its glory in the march. I had never “outed” myself in that way before, proudly wearing a polyamory “Glamorous” shirt. I pointed it out to all of my friends to make sure that they “got” it and to remind them who I am and what I stand for – equality for all, as well as the pursuit of happiness. We ALL deserve to have happy, healthy relationships.
- Speaking of being honored and stoked, I was fortunate enough to capture a freaking fantastic interview with Tikva Wolf herself, creator of the now famous in our circles, Kimchi Cuddles. We will be releasing Part One of this fascinating interview early next week. And I am over the moon about what Tikva shares, getting to know fabulous and inspiring her and how her mind works, what she holds dear to her heart and is passionate about, and much much more! I can pretty much guarantee that you will love it!
It is truly astounding what we can create in our lives if we really focus on what our priorities are, what we want to materialize, what truly brings us joy – while moving obstacles out of our way. Be mindful that obstacles can be in the form of limiting beliefs or gremlins that hold us back, such as “I’m not good enough” to do that = Classic Imposter Syndrome. Is that you? Is there anything in your life that is holding you back, including your own thoughts? What could you accomplish and create in your life if there was nothing holding you back, including your own limiting beliefs? What would you love to focus on in your life to create all of the awesome but can’t seem to find the time?
If you would like to speak with me about creating more healthy love in your life, feel free to sign up for a complementary 20-minute session with me at a time of your choosing based on my scheduler link here. To learn more, feel free to check out my coaching page on this website. I look forward to speaking to some of you and learning more about where you are on your journey.
Wishing you peace, love and happiness,
(and thrilling, fun sex too!)
Kitty