PERSONAL JOURNEY

blog_profile_shotKitty Chambliss is a pen name that I use for myself as the author of this blog. The pen name is necessary due to the day-time jobs of myself and my intimates. Unfortunately, there is still discrimination against those practicing polyamory and ethical non-monogamy in the workplace and the world at large. This website serves to help create more awareness and acceptance for such lifestyles and those who practice them, as well as provide me with a vehicle to share knowledge that I have gained though my experiences and explorations being polyamorous.

Background
I came to the polyamorous lifestyle somewhat by accident, but looking back, I was always polyamorous but did not know this lifestyle was available to me. I grew up in a Catholic school setting being taught that sex was dirty and only for procreation, that masturbation was strictly forbidden and that homosexuals were sexual deviants and therefore bad. I have spent much of my adult life undoing the damage that was done by this teaching in my formative years. It wasn’t until high school and college that I really started to question these teachings as not fitting my belief system and who I was becoming.

I considered myself a “cheating serial monogamist” for much of my dating life in my twenties and beyond, and eventually developed a distaste for the lies, secrecy and feeling of not being authentic that went along with it. When I met my husband-to-be, we both agreed that our previous NON ethical non-monogamy (aka “cheating”) was a behavior that we no longer wanted to engage in. We decided to manage our relationship and later our marriage how we saw fit, and not necessarily along the lines of what we felt society dictated that we do. If it felt good and healthy to us, we were going to write our own rules.

Eventually, a good friend introduced me to a book called “The Ethical Slut”, which is regarded by some as the “bible” of polyamory. I was deeply moved by the writings in this book, and shared it with my husband. It was quite exhilarating! We felt that we had finally found a text that described who we were, who we wanted to be, and how we saw our lives possibly unfolding.

Today
After reading many books, blogs and articles on the topic of polyamory, I eventually met the man who remained my beau for almost five years. He resided with us at our home in Northern Virginia for over two years. Currently I am thrilled to say that I have a new love in my life, my fantastic boyfriend – who is sooo rocking my world! Yay! In addition, we also have a network of close lovers and friends of myself and my husband. Recently, my husband and I celebrated our twelfth anniversary of our first date, and are just as loving, affectionate and happy as ever. Life is grand, and we’re having alot of fun.

I truly believe that we can improve the quality of our lives by improving the quality of our relationships. I believe that at the end of each of our life journeys, it is love and the quality of our connections that we will cherish and hold dear to our hearts, no matter which path you choose to get there. Being vulnerable means knowing who you are and having the courage to share it with those you love. I encourage you to be uniquely and un-apologetically you, because when you’re you, it gives other people permission to be them. And that is one of the best gifts you could give.

Lastly, I believe in loving freely, honestly and openly and having sex-positive relationships if I so choose with my loved ones. I partly live my life based on the motto that “sex is fun and pleasure is good for you.” I believe in feeling love deeply and expressing it openly, and exploring where it takes me. I welcome others to learn and possibly share in the joy of loving without boundaries – if you so choose. Enjoy!  🙂

10 Comments
    • Thank you so much! I really appreciate the kind words. Enjoy all of the posts that are here and more to come. I try to write once a week if I can. Happy Halloween!

  1. Hello, a friend of mine who is in a poly relationship suggested I contact you. I have an internet radio show and will be hosting an open discussion on monogamy and polyamory. I would love it if you would be my special guest or even just call in to share your thoughts on the topic. Here’s the link to the FB event – https://www.facebook.com/events/375211462651294/

    • Thank you so much for contacting me. I would be honored to be your special guest on your Internet radio show. I will send you an email now to discuss the details.
      This is awesome! I’m looking forward to it.
      Kitty

  2. Lex Jones

    You are such an inspiration. Wish I could make it to the conference next weekend. I know you will do an amazing job, you write with such passion. I am in the midst of a journey of self-discovery (i have 2 blogs..one vanilla and one not so much that details my experiences…) and I keep arriving at a roadblock when it comes to monogamy. Must read the book you referenced…
    Love to you and yours!
    LJ

    • I just realized that I never responded to your comment. Thank you so much for your kind and complimentary words. The conference was excellent. Maybe you can go next year. I am so glad that my writing resonates with you, and you see my passion through my words. I write three blogs in total actually, and also feel that I have been on a journey of self-discovery for close to a decade now. So I understand where you are coming from. I hope that you have perhaps been able to read some of the books recommended here. Perhaps living an ethically non-monogamous lifestyle may be for you! Love to you and yours as well! ~Kitty

  3. Anonymous

    Awesome and good to know I can Be in this website

    • You are of course welcome here. This website if for anyone who not only might be interested in ethical non-monogamy, but there is lots of information here in general about maintaining healthy relationships, communication skills and connecting lovingly with our fellow man (or woman). Enjoy!

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